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A thunderstorm was raging that night, and try as she did, she couldn’t ignore it.

And so at 1a.m that night she stepped out into the lashing rain, and began to walk.
It was a hard day, a hard week, a hard month. She was angry and tensed and bewildered at how lost she was in life. But mostly, she was scared.
Terrified. She didn’t know what she was doing with her life anymore, or why she was doing it. She was having a hard time even remembering who she actually was.

So, she let it all go, and went for a walk in the storm.
It was cold, and her teeth chattered, but she didn’t mind. She welcomed the feeling of the rain lashing her body.

She was quivering from head to foot, but she turned her face up, and let the rain pour down. She stood that way for a long, long time.
And as it danced through her hair, and slid down her back, she laughed.
Because she’d never known anything like this. She let the rain drain away all the fear tearing at her soul, and she let it lift the load from her tired shoulders.
This was nothing if not pure, sweet paradise.

She felt so free. As the thunder and lightning waged was above her, she felt peaceful.
Because, in rain she found comfort, and acceptance and belonging.
She found wild, crazy ideas, and pure, destructive love.

She found insane, unadultered joy, and forbidden dark desires.
In it, she heard the laughter of children, and sighs of lovers, and the tears of those like her, who were searching for the Absolute Truth.

She found something comforting and gentle.
But she also found something powerful, and dominating and so overwhelming, it dazzled her.
For rain also spoke of power, and pride and hunger.
Of passion and desire and lust.
She found herself.

That night, the rain was merciless and ruthless, striking everything down.
It was terrible and terrifying, wreaking havoc, lashing at her from all sides, moulding her soul.
It was glorious.

That night, the rain was beautiful.

Before I met him, I would dance in the shower. When he was in my life, I would think about showering with him. After he left, I would sit on the ground in the shower and cry. When I got over him, I showered so quickly there was no time for dancing, fantasies, or tears. Someone can invade the smallest parts of your life, you won’t even realize it until you dance in the shower again and wonder why you ever stopped.
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